AM: When teacher Claude Germain retired from teaching at the Valemoutn Secondary School, his colleagues were so happy they wrote a song about him leaving. JN: Stand by for the beard of Claude Germain. BEARD GERMAIN AM: Born with a beard? JN: You know you’re a man when your born with a beard. AM: And if you’re not a man, you know you’ve got a life time of circus performances waiting for you. JN: Now let’s go to that important news bulletin. AM: Just a second Jody, some of our viewers may not know what we mean when we say important news bulletin. JN: Sure, our graphics department have used computer graphics to help show how important a particular update is in the whole scheme of things. AM: So for instance, an important news bulletin is higher on the list than a nonimportant bulletin, but much lower on the list than an imminent apocalypse. JN: And an American Invasion, while still very high on the list, is lower on the list than a deadly virus outbreak. AM: It’s about transparency. JN: Well take a look for yourself. IMPORTANT NEWS BULLETIN AM: I don’t know if I would agree with our editors on this point. JN: Why? AM: This next story is more of a Critical News Bulletin in my books. JN: Here is a story we’re calling ‘Dirt Cheap: how leafy greens have corrupted the women of Jasper.’ CRAZY FOR KALE AM: Just a dollar a bag for dirt. It’s surprising there isn’t more large scale agriculture going on there. JN: Wow, it’s only a hundred kilometres away, and yet the people are so …